Counting it down to Runaway Groom : Four Reasons to Avoid Small Towns

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4. We aren’t going to
forget that thing you did…
I know, you were twenty.
I know, you were drunk. I don’t care, we won’t forget. We’ll forgive you, since
you grew up to be such a nice adult and all, but we won’t forget.
3. No, seriously…
Ever. We won’t forget. We’re
telling your grandkids about it.
2. We really do only
accept cash.

We don’t care that all
the places you’ve ever been to before accept your little plastic card, we don’t.
There is an ATM over there. Use that, bring us money. Kthxbai.
1. You may never want to
We grow on you. Like
mold. It might be insidious, but it happens. You’ll fall in love with us and
you’ll put some roots down and you’ll never see a reason to live anywhere else…even
if they don’t get buried in ten feet of snow and have a Starbucks. This will
become home and that will be what matters at the end of the day.

You were warned. O.o

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